Thursday, March 27, 2008

Health Inventory

I am amazed by the power of spring! Yesterday, while resting as I have a nasty cold, I was suddenly moved to do some major spring cleaning. I went through all of my old journals. I threw many away! I went through all of my writing. I threw much of that away too! It was hard, as anyone who writes can tell you, throwing away things you put all of your emotions into....BUT, I want to say, it felt so good! I know my story, my life continues to ripen, and I am inviting in the new by purging the old. I have been entertaining the notion of tossing out, almost ceremonially, all my writing and poetry, all of my very raw journals pertaining to the abuse, and holy cow I did it! Such weight is lifted. If I want to write about it again, I can. In a new way. If not, that's great too! I wanted to let go of the story. In a way I am rewriting my life. In the now that is. It's not about erasure, or disowning the past, but it is a symbolic cleansing of the old story. I am redefining myself and my life, including the past, and I am redefined. I have longed to start new. I am so glad I finally took this step.

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