Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Sensuality as a Practice

Recovering our sensual side, our sensual selfhood.
Put on make up slowly, while listening to My Funny Valentine, by Chet Baker.
Applying lipstick to this lilting groove is so very sensual. Notice if you get chills. Savor them.
Treat yourself to nice things. There is a huge difference between 'materialism' and the desire to surround oneself with things that make you feel whole, creative, and authentically you. Not everything has to be expensive! Do what you can to treat yourself exactly how you have been dreaming a man (or woman) would. Do it for yourself. Make yourself those love mixes on your ipod. This is not narcissism, so anyone who tells you that you are feeding your ego is in pain and dissociated from what true self esteem is and how to nurture it. They were probably abused, and are brainwashed. Not your problem. They say grandiose, we say just plain GRAND!
Adorning oneself with beautiful jewelry, luxurious lingerie, pretty peasant tops made from silk, these are all ways to feel inspired, sensual, and self loving. The more we can love ourselves the more we can love others, and the more we love others, the more we learn to love ourselves. One theory is that the ego sees any love directed at another as love directed toward the self. In this way, you can learn to love by loving others. But that's only one idea about how to love ourselves. The other thing to be cognizant of is that we can only love others to the extent we love ourselves. Love that is fraught with desperate attachment, expectations, and illusions is not really love at all. I've heard it all when it comes to people who are squashing your newfound and hard earned sense of self love and nurturing. For eons folks have been threatened by powerful and sensual women. Make this a mantra:

by Maya Angelou

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies
I'm not cute or built to suit a model's fashion size
But when I start to tell them
They think I'm telling lies.
I say
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips
The stride of my steps
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenal woman
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please
And to a man
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees
Then they swarm around me
A hive of honey bees.
I say
It's the fire in my eyes
And the flash of my teeth
The swing of my waist
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenal woman
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say
It's in the arch of my back
The sun of my smile
The ride of my breasts
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman
Phenomenal woman
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say
It's in the click of my heels
The bend of my hair
The palm of my hand
The need for my care.
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenal woman
That's me.

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